


Pretty Boy Code!

by ImpureElegance (Nerdy_Girl)



Category: The Legend of Zelda & Related Fandoms
Genre: Bad Puns, Frottage, M/M, Sarcasm, cum licking, innuendos, lots of fuckin sarcasm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-17
Updated: 2016-10-17
Packaged: 2018-08-22 22:50:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,184
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8304221
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nerdy_Girl/pseuds/ImpureElegance
Summary: Scarfy and Time are all out of options to resolve their fights. Or, so they think… Scarfy (HW!Link) x Time. NSFW. Shameless porn.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! So this is all a part of an AU I have where all of the Links' personalities are ridiculous. I gave the ones who have no name nicknames and so you won't be confused I'll just put them here and a short description of their personality
> 
> Alti - A Link to the Past Link. He's antisocial and easy to excite. 
> 
> Venturer - Legend of Zelda and Adventure of Link Link. He doesn't speak much and he scares all of the Links except for Alti.
> 
> Youngin' - Majora's Mask Link. He's mischievous and likes to pull pranks on people
> 
> Also in this AU, Time has fucked nearly all the Links.

It was happening. Again. The hilarious yet sad narcissistic bickering between the two self-proclaimed ‘hottest’ Links. Every bicker session started off with an ego stroking comment from Scarfy about his own looks, whether it be serious or not, and naturally Time would have to reply with how he was so much better looking. It would soon turn into a vainglorious match of who was overall better than the other, until one of them would hit a nerve, then it’d result in a piddling fight. The last time it happened resulted in two spent egoists, broken vases, damaged plants, and a very distraught Sky. In the midst of their battle they managed to destroy all of Sky’s pretty flowers and other various greenery. After a good scolding from Twi and a vague but still colorfully violent threat from Alti and Venturer, Time took Sky to get new plants and vases as well as out to eat his favorite food (pumpkin soup), and Scarfy made it up to him later on that night. From that day forward they were banned from sparring in order to settle a dispute. So, what were they to do now that they were in a heated argument and had no way to resolve it?

Twi abruptly stood up. “You know what? I’ve just about had it wit’ y’all!” he exploded, pointing a finger at them. “All y’all do is argue, so guess what? Continue doin’ that. Me and the other Links are going out to get away from this.”

All at once, the other Links got up and exited the room. Windy was walking slowly and somberly, looking back at Scarfy and Time sadly before looking away and muttering “I really wanted to see this fight…”

Sky kneeled down in front of the youth. “Awww, don’t be sad. How about we warp to my time and I take you for a ride on Big Red? How would you like that?”

Windy tried to contain his excitement by being somber. “I guess that’s cool…”

With a bright smile, he grabbed the latter and put him on his shoulders. “C’mon kiddo! To the skies we go!”

“And don’t think about following us. Alti and Venturer will take care of you if you attempt to do that.” Sounded Twi’s distant voice, followed by glares from the aforementioned Links.

The sound of the door closing filled Time and Scarfy’s ears, followed by his frustrated sigh. “Look what you’ve done! Now we can’t be with the others.”

“ _Me_? All I did was simply reply to you.”

“It’s your fault. If you would just accept the fact that I’m leagues sexier than you none of this would have transpired.”

Time stared at the warrior angrily, but decided against saying anything.

Scarfy sighed dramatically. “How could they just leave me like that? You can’t just leave the hot one when you go out!"

Rolling his eyes, he ‘tut’ed. “Go stroke your dick somewhere else. Preferable away from me.”

“Oh, I bet you’d like that wouldn’t you?” he replied. “How about I just stay right here and ‘stroke it’ instead hm? I’d enjoy every second of it.”

Time laughed. “Wow Scarfy, didn’t know you swung that way,” he started sarcastically. “That explains a lot.”

“Really? Remind me again who the one that got to bang Princess Zelda was?”

Rolling his eyes again, he folded his arms over his chest. “Even if you did, need I remind you who was the one who was also making Sky moan so loud the other night?”

Scarfy looked away and blushed. “Heh, I just wanted to apologize for breaking his plant vases…”

“From the sounds of it you apologized _wonderfully_ ,” Time teased, a smirk on his face.

“W-well, at least _I_ can make him moan like that!”

He chuckled. “Anyone can make him moan like that. Don’t feel special.”

He folded his arms over his chest as well. “That still doesn’t take away from the fact that I’m better in bed than you.”

Time cocked his eyebrows. “You really think that?” He laughed.

Scarfy leaned forward, his eyes bright. “I don’t _think_ , Time, I _know_.”

If anyone else was with them at that moment, they would’ve thought there was a silence in the room. The next words to fall from Time’s lips nearly went unnoticed by Scarfy, their absurdity the only thing able to make him hear.

The warrior choked on nothing. “Pardon me?”

Clearing his throat, Time spoke louder. “I said to prove it to me,” he said, a smirk spreading across his face as the latter went red.

Placing a finger in the middle of his chest, Scarfy pushed Time onto his back and straddled his waist. “Very well. A pretty boy can’t turn down a challenge, can he?” He said with a chuckle.

Grabbing his scarf, the Hero of Time pulled him forward and placed a delicate kiss on his lips. Pulling away before he could place another, he smiled. “ _Pretty boys_ also don’t talk so much shit.”

An offended sounded gasp emitted from Scarfy. How dare he?! With a newfound fuel, he roughly grabbed the elder’s face and kissed him deeper than before, removing one of his hands to fumble with his belt.

They both parted from the kiss after what felt like eons and stared into each other’s eyes, both faces flushed and panting slightly. Scarfy took this time to successfully remove the other Link’s belt.

“What’s the rush? We have all the time in the world to do this,” he said with an annoyingly large grin.

His eyes snapped up to Time’s and narrowed. “Shut the fuck up.”

Scarfy kissed and sucked along his jaw and down to his neck, eliciting soft moans from Time. He grabbed his wrists and pinned them above his head with one hand, while the other worked on removing his own belt.

Time took in a sharp breath at a particularly hard nip at his neck and squirmed. “Ahh, Scarfy…”

This made him smile in accomplishment as he continued what he was doing. “Enjoying yourself, are we?” He said smugly, sneaking his hand under the latter’s tunic. He felt up and down Time’s torso, silently admiring the dips and curves of his muscles.

He couldn’t let him have all the fun could he? Lifting Scarfy’s head he assaulted his lips and sat up so the warrior could be in his lap. He snatched the blue scarf off and was just about to take off his tunic when the warrior broke the kiss and held up a finger.

“Pretty boy code states that true pretty boys take off their own clothes,” He said, lifting the green tunic above his head and flashing a seductive smile.

Oh? Well two can play at that game. Time followed suit, taking off his shirt as well and tossing them both to the side. He leaned back on his hands as he watched Scarfy undo his pants and pull them down just enough for his cock to spring out.

The Hero of Time pulled his tights down to free his own cock, sighing at the lack of pressure. He put a hand on Scarfy’s hip and pulled him closer and closer, until both their members were touching.

The warrior wrapped his arms around his neck and started grinding on the latter. The room was soon filled with his pants and moans coupled with Time’s. He pushed him down once again so that he was lying on his back, resuming his grinding at a slightly rougher pace.

“Ahh… Scarfy…” Time moaned, biting his lip and putting his other hand on his hip. “More,” He said, rolling his hips to match the latter Link’s pace.

He leaned downed to kiss Time, every moment they broke away for air a sigh or groan slipped past his lips.

Time thoroughly enjoyed Scarfy’s moans, both his hands on the latter’s hips to keep him steady and slow his grinding slightly.

The warrior was alternating between squeezing his nipples and putting his hands in the middle of his chest, leaving tiny scratches in Time’s chest when he’d be hit with a pang of pleasure.

Their frenzied pace didn’t allow them the time to savor the sensations they gave to each other, and before long Scarfy was climaxing with a sequence of moans that sounded like singing, followed closely by Time, his moans long and drawn out.

Scarfy and Time stayed in their position on the floor, faces flushed and panting, and the Hero of Time’s stomach covered in cum. He reached his fingers down into the puddle to scoop some up and bring them to his mouth, earning him a disproving shake of the head but a cock twitch that said otherwise.

“Don’t act like you haven’t tasted cum before,” Time said, sucking his fingers dry. “And, do tell me again who’s better in bed? You came awful fast just now…”

His face flared up more than it already was. “Uh… I was just undersexed! It’s been a while since my last release. Of course I was going to be earlier than usual.”

Time allowed him to move from on top of him before he sat up on his elbows and gave him an incredulous look. “Really? 14 hours is such a long time…”

“What can I say? When you look this good you get used to having sex often.”

“Yes, of course. And Hylia knows you get it often, Mr. Warrior. Mind telling me about the many times you ended up getting fucked by all those strong, courageous men in your army? I’d love to hear about all the gangbangs you were the star of!”

Scarfy’s eyes widened. “…I’m going to get you a towel so you can get cleaned up.”

Time smirked. He got just the reaction he wanted. “I’d love it if you licked it off though…”

Tucking himself in and getting up, he answered as he turned to walk away. “I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that.”

“Too bad. Pretty Boy Code states says that all pretty boys lick it up. Maybe you aren’t a pretty boy after all,” He said, still smirking.

Scarfy paused mid step before turning around slowly. “You know what? I’ll lick it off. Anything to get you to shut the hell up.”

He walked up to Time briskly and kneeled over him once again. He bent over and licked his stomach and cock clean slowly. “Are you happy now?”

The Hero of Time, who was flushed and panting a bit at the purposeful action, nodded. “Did your defeat taste as good as it did to me?”

“It tasted _fantastic_.”

Time pulled his tights back up and sat up fully, reaching for his shirt. He dressed himself quicker than Scarfy, and sat and watched the aforementioned Link finish redressing himself.

He plopped down besides Time on the couch as he was tossing his scarf on his neck, clearly annoyed. “Next time I’ll show you that I’m better than you in bed.”

He didn’t even bother turning his way to retort. “Next time? I think the fact that you’re looking forward to a next time speaks volumes about my capabilities.”

Before Scarfy got the chance to explain himself the other Links walked in from their outing.

“Hey, you guys didn’t kill each other while we were gone,” Sky said as he walked into the room first, his ever present smile on his girly lips.

“And the living room is still intact,” Twi added as he walked in right behind Sky. The other Links were in the room by the time he spoke again “Did you two talk it out this time?”

Time cut Scarfy off. “Yes, we did. I didn’t realize just how _sweet_ he is,” He said before sucking on one of his fingers, making a popping sound when he removed it from his mouth.

Twi was the first one to catch on to what Time was implying. “O-oh… um…” His face grew red at the situation. “I just… I’m gonna go… To my room… In-in my time…” He ran right back out the door.

Sky was the second to speak up. “Oh my! Well I uh, I think I’m gonna go to, um, my room? Too?” He made his way upstairs, bumping into the wall on his way while muttering ‘join the club, Scarfy’.

Windy cocked an eyebrow. He tugged on Alti’s sleeve, noting that he looked like he’d seen a ghost. “Hey man, why’s everyone acting so weird?”

Venturer fell into a fit of coughs, his usual stoic and brooding demeanor broken at the news. Wordlessly he walked upstairs, shaking his head as the words ‘fucking slut’ tumbled from his lips between coughs.

“…Holy shit…” Alti whispered. He turned around and walked upstairs, wide eyed.

The youngest Links exchanged questioning glances before shrugging and running out the door to go do who knows what.

Scarfy was gripping his knees as he glared at Time, his jaw visibly clenched.

Time held up his hands defensively. “What? I’m pretty sure the Pretty Boy Code states that you must brag about any and all sexual encounters.”


End file.
